Tuesday, February 3, 2009

A safe place

This feeling
Like I'm drowning
In a sea of everything

My self
(What is self?)
Is lost
Is being lost
Even as I cling to it hopelessly
It is slipping

I can still see it
It is not far
But far enough to make me fear
That it may not come back
That it may be different when it does
(Numerically? Qualitatively?)
That I'm losing it

My self
(What is that?)
Is slipping
I am slipping
(As the reeds whisper from the edge)
I am the one being lost
Drifting
Being carried away

Arms
I need arms around me
Grounding me
Reminding me that I am myself
(Though the locks may disagree)
Reminding me
Of everything
Yet not saying a word
Just holding
Grounding

Alas
I am alone
No arms tonight
Just my own
Holding myself in
Against the sea
Surviving
(What does that mean?)
Closing my eyes to the water
Huddled in a dark place
My safe place